Co-Parenting Tips

1. Keep the child out of adult conflict Avoid discussing court, finances, relationship issues, or negative opinions about the other parent in front of the child.  

2. Use business-like communication Keep messages brief, factual, and focused on the child. A helpful rule is: polite, clear, and no emotional arguing.  

3. Create consistency where possible Children benefit from predictable routines around bedtime, homework, meals, screen time, and transitions between homes.  

4. Do not use the child as a messenger Communication about schedules, belongings, appointments, or concerns should happen directly between adults.  

5. Support the child’s relationship with the other parent Even if the co-parent relationship is difficult, children usually do best when they are allowed to love both parents without guilt.  

6. Prepare for transitions calmly Help the child know what to expect: “You’ll be with dad this weekend, and I’ll see you Sunday.” Keep goodbyes warm but not overly emotional.  

7. Focus on what is within your control A parent cannot control the other household, but they can control their own tone, consistency, emotional regulation, and boundaries.  

8. Use neutral language Instead of saying, “Your mom/dad never follows the schedule,” say, “We are still figuring out the schedule, and the adults will handle it.”  

9. Have a shared plan for important things When possible, agree on medical care, school expectations, discipline, technology use, and emergency contacts.  

10. Repair when mistakes happen If conflict happens in front of the child, a parent can say: “That was an adult problem, and it was not your fault. We are working on handling things better.”